V̶a̶l̶e̶n̶t̶i̶n̶e̶s̶-D̶a̶y̶ : Cheers to the Single, Bitter and Lonely People. No, Is Not A Battyman Holiday.

So it’s February 14th again. The day of love & hugs & kisses & rainbows & a fat little fairy named Cupid; the one day when relationships should go right and the stars and moon must align for love (gags). A man is expected to be the knight in shining armour and the woman is expected to be showered with gifts and adored as a princess. This gives rise to some serious commercialisation, as the poor guy is required to spend, and in most cases spend big. Failure to provide a gift could get him sent to the doghouse. At the end of it all though, this day is intended to celebrate one of the most powerful forces known to man, love.

However, this hasn’t been the case today. Instead, single people all across BBM, Twitter, Facebook.. hell, even Hi5 & MySpace, have joined forces to declare war on love and particularly on Valentine’s Day. The posts and status changes are all bitter rants from single people, devastated at love lost and seeking to rain on everybody else’s parade and I’m thinking STFU and get over it.

1. It isn’t our fault you’re single.

2. Being single doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate love.

3. If you were in a relationship, you’d glorify the day.

So I’m thinking is just badmind. Yuh badmind and bitta because no one wants you. In that case, see my post on the joys of masturbation. Orrrrrr yuh vex wid di world because some unknown guy/girl from some long forgotten time in history broke your heart, and so yuh bitta, bitta like gall. Well, boo wooo. Suck it the hell up and move on. Stop being a grinch. The attacks on Valentine’s Day range from “is a battyman (gay) holiday” to “is just a way to mek money”. So I went to do some research on the origins of Valentine’s Day, is it really a “battyman holiday”?

On the contrary, Valentine’s Day is named after the christian martyr, Saint Valentine. The day was established in the christian calendar by Pope Gelasius in the year 496 AD. It has since been deleted by Pope Paul. Valentine was a priest, sentenced to death for defying a Roman decree which stated that soldiers were not allowed to marry. According to legend, while in prison awaiting his execution, he fell in love with a blind girl. On the evening of his execution he passed a note to her which read “from your Valentine”. The rest is history. This simple act of passing a note gave rise to the sending of cards, love letters and chocolate. Single, bitter and lonely people decided to make up the idea that it is a gay holiday to incite homophobia and possibly ruining the celebration of the day. There are actually two men named Valentine, the saint and another fellow. Somewhere along the line, the two men ended up together. It’s a myth. As to the criticism that the day is commercialised, which major holiday isn’t? Welcome to capitalism.

So now that we’ve cleared that up, even if you can’t get the roses and chocolate and the much anticipated valentine’s day sex, which is really good by the way; especially if is a quickie on the beach over by….*clears throat*…but I digress. Right, so you can still celebrate the love of your family, the love of your friends, the love of that creepy stalker on Twitter or FB, wha bout the yute whe did sex yuh from Twitter? Di same one whose name you never got, yeah him. Celebrate his love, I’m sure he told you he loved you at some point during the back and forth DMing. Otherwise yuh life sad bad! Anyhow, celebrate something! Just stop being so bitter. It doesn’t help your case. You and I know that once you fall in love again, your views will change about valentine’s day and it will be the perfect day for you. So here’s to you… I love you all. Cheers to the single, bitter and lonely people all across the world. Happy Valentine’s Day!! ^_^