Best News & Current Affairs Blog (2012) and Jamaican Blogger of the Year (2011) at The Jamaica Blog Awards.

Untitled


Black?

I’m thinking about a million things in a dark space, in a small space. This isn’t the way I thought it would be. When I  conceived it so many years ago, I was supposed to be sure by now…but I’m not.

I’m watching it all as if from a distance and as I watch the fear that I’m a disappointment and a failure is slowly consuming me and I can feel my mind willing me to fight, but I can’t, I have no fight left in me.

I have failed.

The funny thing is that everyone else thinks otherwise. I’m supposed to hold immense potential and I’m supposed to have great promise, I don’t though. You’re wrong.

You don’t see the inside of my happiness.

I’m slowly retreating into myself. Nothing matters anymore. The last thing that I had to hold on to is over. I debate, therefore I am. That’s what I’d tell myself. It’s over now, so there’s nothing from stopping the darkness.

A dark space, a small space.

Black.

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2 Responses

  1. Jamaican Taxi

    Black seems sad, mek u neva try white?

    January 11, 2012 at 7:52 pm

  2. Wow! I do quite like this! Feel the same way at times!!! But then there are the few days when I don’t feel like totally throwing in the towel and there seems to be hope yet!

    January 11, 2012 at 9:04 pm

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